Hooping: My Heaven

I bought myself a hoop sometime during the second half of the summer. It was a pink and purple, two-pound hoop that I planned to use specifically for exercise. At that time I hadn’t even considered the idea of learning how to dance with my hoop or find other people in my neighborhood who may have had a similar interest. All I wanted to do was get a little bit of a workout in the privacy of my home. It wasn’t until I had pretty much nailed waist hooping and could keep the hoop spinning for about twenty consecutive minutes that I decided I wanted to learn how to do tricks. 

By the time October rolled around, I had really taken an interest in the ART of hooping. There were plenty of tutorials on Youtube to choose from and I watched a few to try to learn some things. However, I soon found out that my apartment simply wasn’t big enough for me to even attempt many of the tricks I wanted to learn. So, I began my search for other hoopers in my community. I didn’t realize how big the Denver hoop scene was and I’ve only met a small fraction of the awesome folks in it. My good friend, Baby, happens to live two blocks from me and her and I now hoop together regularly. 

My collection of hoops is growing. It’s currently at four which all vary in size and weight. I have no intention of stopping my collection here. With as easy as they are to make, don’t be surprised if I have a wall full of hoops someday. 

I’ve progressed quickly and can now hoop around my waist, foot, thigh, neck, hand and elbow. The tricks are a bit harder and take time to master, but I intend to master them all. Hooping has really helped me focus my energy on one thing at a time. If I’ve had a rough day, I walk to Cheesman Park and practice a trick until I get it perfect (even if I only get it perfect once). Hooping helps me turn negative energy into positive and by the time I’m finished, I don’t even care to think about what was wrong anymore. It’s like a weight is lifted off of my shoulders and I can pay attention to things, or people, that matter more than my problems. 

I guess you could say that hooping has become my own personal heaven. It ranks right alongside writing and painting for me except one benefit that I get with hooping that I don’t get with the other art forms is a sweet set of abs. While I don’t have them just yet, I will. I’ve already noticed a considerable difference in my waistline since I started and I feel great about that. I also incorporate my own style of dancing into hooping which just makes it even more fun.

Who isn’t happy when they’re jammin’ out to their favorite tunes, dancing, hooping and laughing? I know I am. 

I’m really glad to have found such a seemingly simple activity that makes me smile as often as I do. I’m also super excited to start choreographing some routines and make videos to show anybody who wants to watch. There’s really no sense in being this happy if you can’t share it with the world, right? So, in closing… keep an eye out for updates, photos, videos and maybe even a live performance here or there. I’ve got some cool stuff in store with this hoop business.

 

 

 

 

A Letter From the Future to the Past

January 4th, 2013

Dear Rachael of the Past,

Wow… what a year 2012 was! I can’t believe how crazy my life has been over the last twelve months. At first I wasn’t really sure what was going to happen… but I’ve accomplished a ridiculous amount this year. Definitely more than I had ever thought possible.

I got a new job. It’s everything that I have been wanting and I’ve been there for about nine months now. It’s nothing like my old job at the hospital. I do what I love… I get to write about all kinds of interesting subject matter and no one day is the same as the next. I’m making about $20,000 more than I was which bumped me up to $50K. Talk about sweet! My coworkers are amazingly talented writers and we’re all quite creative. It seems that our hair colors change as quick as the projects do and I can’t tell you how awesome it is to be able to come to work in my sweats if I want. In fact, I oftentimes do. Not only that… I get to sleep in a few times a week… no more getting up at 6am. The alarm on my phone is all but useless.

My artwork has progressed and I’ve even sold a few of them. The stress relief that I feel when I paint  totally rules. Oh, and guess what!? I’ve become super awesome at hooping and my bass no longer collects dust in the corner of my house. I’ve put together a couple dance routines and learned some rad tricks with my hoop. The Hoopkateers have really taken off and because of this, I’ve lost the extra 30 pounds that I had on me before I started. These abs are definitely something to be proud of.

I’ve written a couple songs on my bass and am pretty close to getting this band started. Remember the metal band that I’ve been dreaming about since childhood? Yeah. It’s almost here. Give it a few more months and who knows… maybe I’ll be writing to you about the shows I just played.

I visited New York and Seattle this year. Both of which were rad. I met a ton of new people and made a lot of great contacts. I even gained a couple clients who I’m now doing freelance writing projects for. I went to LA and visited all of my friends there. It was so great to see them all again after such a long time. Oh, and I finally got my passport and I’m going on a trip to Ireland in a month. After all this time, I’m finally going.

I have a boyfriend now. We’ve been together for a few months and he’s rad. We go to shows a lot, go skateboarding, hang out and just have fun. He’s my best friend and I don’t know what I’d do without him. We’re both independent and the jealousy factor is pretty much nonexistent. It’s really quite a lovely situation for both of us. To be honest, I love the guy and the best part of it is… he loves me too. The guy can match me when it comes to farting which, to some, may be kind of disgusting. But you know how I am. We compliment each other well.

One more thing that you’re going to be proud of me for doing… I finally started writing my book and I’m about half way through. I’ve decided to make it an urban fantasy series and I’ve got a couple agents and publishers interested in it when it’s finished. I’m not sure how many books I’ll write for this particular series, but I figure I’ll get through the first one before I start thinking about any of the others. Either way… it’s great that this is finally panning out. Great things happen when you finally stop being lazy.

I’m very close to completing school. I believe I only have one more month left. By the way, the lip balm I created works great. There is already one shop in Boulder that carries it and I’m working on getting it into a few shops here in Denver.

It’s really awesome to be doing so many things that I love. It’s like I don’t ever have to work. Life is just that good and I’m super stoked. I know that it only gets better from here. Yeah, there were a few rough spots but life wouldn’t be interesting without them and I’d never grow into the amazing person that I have. So, while the tough times sucked a bit I’m very grateful for them. They helped to shape who I am and what I aspired (and aspire) to be.

I can’t wait for you to see who I am a year from today in 2014. Prepare yourself because it’s only going to get wilder… and never forget that I love you.

Love,

Rachael of the Future

 

All I Needed was a Snow Day

I called in to work today after spending 20 minutes simply trying to get off my street… and it seems this day off is exactly what I needed. After a particularly tumultuous day yesterday that left me drained and wondering if I could even stand to get up this morning, the gods gave me a bit of a break with a ridiculous amount of snow.

When I walked out to my car this morning there was about nine inches of snow just chillin’ on the roof and another foot surrounding the vehicle itself. I brushed the snow off, got inside and turned on some In Flames. Perfect music for the holiday season if you ask me. I was able to get down the street, but when I tried to turn left on Colfax I got stuck. I backed up, tried to turn right and got stuck again. After numerous attempts to get unstuck, I backed into a parking space and turned my car off. It looked like work was going to have to wait. There just wasn’t anything I could do.

I walked back into my apartment after letting the higher ups know the sitch and got back into my sweats. About an hour later I went and checked to see if the snow had lightened up at all. Nope. It had only gotten worse and so had the roads. I made a “Rachael’s safety” executive decision and decided that it would be best for me to just stay home. From what I’ve been told, people generally like having me around and what kind of jerk would I be if I went and got myself in an accident? A big one.

So I’m sitting here comfortably in my warm bed thinking about some things and helping my mom get some little writing projects done. Having this day to decompress is doing wonders for my attitude and I feel like I could go to work with a better outlook… but I feel like the snow has other plans. At least for my actually getting to my place of employment that is. I’m thinking some reading, writing, meditation and perhaps some painting and laundry are in order. Sending out some good vibes for a few necessary changes would probably be a good idea too.

Today, it’s gonna be about me and getting my mental state in better shape from the comfort of my little apartment. It’s the season of Yule (or Christmas, Hannukah, or whatever festivity you deem appropriate) and people are supposed to have some things to be happy about. Certain aspects of my life have been less than appealing as of late but I figure I’ve got a whole lot more to be happy about. With that being said, I’m off to make myself some food and immerse myself in a story book.

Stay classy, friends.

 

It’s Good to See You, California

The last time I was in California was Thanksgiving 2010… exactly one year ago. It was a rough time to be back as I had only left one month prior and was still dealing heavily with the emotional trauma of a breakup, adjusting to a new home, and all in all figuring out what the hell I was doing and what was going to happen next. My world was both light and dark… often at the same time. There was so much going on in my head and I had a rough time feeling anything but hatred for this place.

It’s really amazing how much can change over the course of 365 days. People evolve, animosity fades into apathy, the good memories take their rightful place in the forefront and push the negative thoughts back into shadow. Actions and words, while never forgotten, are forgiven and lessons are learned that couldn’t have been otherwise.

This year’s trip has been different. I was slightly apprehensive about what I would feel once I landed in Ontario… afraid, if you will, of feeling the same things that I felt last year. But after being here for a little over 24 hours, I haven’t felt any of the sour feelings that I did previously. In fact it has been the exact opposite.

My mom and I spent the day running around Temecula enjoying good food and tasty wine. I actually got a little excited when I saw signs for the 10 freeway and started remembering the good times I had while living in California. I even wished that I had a few more days to make a trip up to LA to visit friends (though I’m making plans for that in the Spring). I’ve been getting texts and Facebook messages from homies who want to catch me while I’m in town and kind words letting me know that I have been missed.

I guess I didn’t really realize how many people my leaving would affect or the impact that I’ve had on my friends over the years. When you go through a life trial it’s easy to focus on the emotional pain instead of on the positive aspects of what’s happening. Being back here has been a positive experience thus far and it has made me really miss being out here. While I still feel that I have outgrown California, I’m most definitely not opposed to visiting a bit more frequently.

Never in my life did I think the hatred I had would fade… but really, it wasn’t California that I hated. Yes, Los Angeles is a dirty, disgusting place with way too many people who have their heads shoved so far up their asses that they can’t tell the difference between the light of the studio and the sun. But, it’s where I grew up and it’s where I met some of the most amazing friends that a girl could ask for. What I hated was the way that my circumstances had made me FEEL. I hated the way another person’s POWER over me made me feel. I hated that I had allowed someone else to have that much power. California just happened to symbolize everything that was happening to me emotionally at that time.

This time around I can honestly say that it’s good to be here. It’s nice to be back. It’s cool to be reminded of all the good and crazy times I had while I was growing up here. I’m happy to be with my mom and to see some of my friends. To know that I mattered… and still matter… it’s a rad feeling. Being back in California has confirmed my own evolution and growth. I’m different than I was at this same time last year and it’s a relief to actually see what such substantial change can do for a person. I heard once that people are like tea bags… they don’t know their own strength until they get into hot water.

Thanks for the hot water, California.

 

Celebrating Samhain… and Honoring Those Who’ve Gone Before Me

We had our first snow the other day… well, our first heavy(ish) snow really. I have been looking forward to the cooler weather, the shorter daylight hours and darker seasons of the year pretty much since Spring bloomed. Now here we are again, ready to repeat the cycle of life, death & rebirth. In a few days I will celebrate Halloween, but this year it will be a bit different.

2011 will mark my first year celebrating Halloween as Samhain (Sau-in), which is basically the Celtic New Year… it is when the Horned God must make some sweet, sweet lovin’ to the Great Mother and start the process of makin’ the baby that will grow into the following year. Samhain also marks the time when the veil between our world and the Otherworld is at its thinnest and those who have passed on before us may cross back over to visit us or vice versa. It is when we honor our ancestors and celebrate their lives.

This year I’ll be celebrating the lives of everyone that I’ve lost… from my grandmother, my cousins Chris & Nicole, my love Jack, and my friend Sunny. All of these people left this life way to soon in my opinion but they’ll forever be remembered for who they were and how they influenced and touched the lives of those around them. And of course, as is typical Rachael style, I will be having a beer (and/or a shot) for each of them… covered in face paint and fake blood. Well, at least for part of the night.

Samhain is a very cool holiday though it does touch a bit on a more serious note. So while I will be celebrating in costume and with a beer in hand, I will also be meditating and remembering who all of these people were to me and why I’m a better person who just happened to be lucky enough to know them.

As I learn more about Samhain and the other important pagan holidays that occur each year, I may (or may not) become a bit more traditional in my celebrating… but since this is my first attempt at really understanding what this holiday means and why it’s important to me, I’ll stick with keepin’ it a bit on the lighter side. Especially since I know that those who I’m choosing to honor wouldn’t have it any other way.

 

Ready to Love… Again

It’s been over a year since my relationship ended and I made the decision to move to CO. The day I realized that a year had passed was strange and incredible at the same time. I’ve been away from home for nearly that same amount of time and it amazes me to see how much I’ve accomplished when, at one point, I thought I would die from all the emotional pain I suffered. The last year has had its ups and downs and has been chock full of experiences that I couldn’t have had otherwise. I’ve gotten to know myself extremely well and acknowledge both my strengths and my flaws. I’ve grown into a strong woman and an individual. And now, I’m ready to love again…

It’s taken a year to be comfortable in my own skin again… to figure out who Rachael is. Let me tell you a bit about me… I’m loud, brash, I fart a lot, I love food, I like my music turned up and the windows rolled down. I like parkour, my friends, beer, tattoos, playing my bass and doing stupid things to make people laugh. I get scared sometimes. I’m confident and I know I’m a blast to be around. I can be shy although most of my friends would tell you otherwise. I like to dance. I blush when someone I like gives me a compliment and if that someone asks me out to dinner, I may do a jig when I’m alone in my house and no one can see me. Every now and then, I get a little insecure. Sometimes I think I’m invincible. If I fall down, I get back up and I mean that in both literal and figurative senses. If you’re being an asshole, I have no problem telling you so to your face.

While there’s always more to a person than what they can type in a paragraph, that’s pretty much me in a nutshell. After figuring all of these things out or, in some cases, rediscovering some of them, I’ve decided that I’m a pretty rockin’ lady. I’ve also finally, FINALLY let go of the one thing that has been holding me back over this past year. Attachment. My attachment to my ex was the one thing that kept me from opening up to a new relationship. Once I figured out that he wasn’t holding me back, but that my attachment was, things became easier and I was able to deal. The guy isn’t here pushing me into a corner telling me that I can’t move on. He’s moved on and I have every right to do the same. I cannot even tell you how good it felt to have that weight lifted off my shoulders.

I feel like I can finally give the attention that a relationship with someone really deserves. I didn’t want to start something with another person while I still had my ex kickin’ it in the back of my head… and now I don’t have to worry about that. I haven’t been ready for a new relationship in over a year even though I thought I was many times over. This time is different. This time, I feel COMPLETELY free.

 

I’m Alive!

Hey Everybody!

This is just a quick update to let you all know that I’m alive and well… my computer is still out of commission and I’m in the process of acquiring a new one. If all goes well tomorrow, I may have one within the next couple of weeks. What’s happening tomorrow? Well, I’ll fill you in when I have a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ confirmation. Until then, you’ll just have to keep guessing.

Anyway, lots of crazy things have been happening in my life and I’m excited about all the changes. I’m rebuilding my social media presence on both Twitter (@rockitpixie) and Facebook, thinking about my true passions and how I can turn them into a thriving business. My brother gave me a book by a guy named Gary Vaynerchuk and the dude knows his stuff. If you have a chance to read “Why Now is the Time to Crush It: Cash in on Your Passion“, DO IT! It’s because of this book that I’m doing what I’m doing. More on that later.

I’ve been getting back into my art, I’ve finally picked up my bass again, and I’m meeting more and more people in this rad city every day. Work has been interesting and  a lot of drastic changes are being made. I’m still single and I’m quite happy about it. I’ve gotten used to being on my own in pretty much every way and it feels damn good. Hmm, what else… OH! Wait, I can’t tell you about that yet. Ha!

So yeah, I wanted to let you all know that I have NOT fallen off the face of the planet, but I have been getting myself into some shenanigans (surprise, surprise) and will be back on a more regular blog posting schedule soon. So, thank you to everyone who has been patient with me and to all my readers who continue to read and suggest my blog to your friends. It means a lot. Until next time, take it easy and keep it classy!

 

 

All Moved In & On My Own

I moved into my apartment this week. It’s crazy and exciting to finally be on my own… it’s something that seemed as though it would never come, yet here I am, all grown up and ready to take on the world. The first night in my new place alone was strange… waking up was even stranger, but I’ve quickly become accustomed to it.

Arranging things the way that I want them has been fun and I have had the opportunity to do a few things on my own already. I can’t really eat now unless I make myself food. I put my bookshelf together without anyone’s help (other than borrowing my friend Rob’s screw drivers).

My little basement apartment is starting to feel like home. I light incense to make it smell how I like it to smell. I have pictures of friends and family on the walls. My books are in plain sight and I can grab them whenever I want. The best part though, is being able to prance around my own damn living room in nothin’ but my birthday suit. Sorry guys, the curtains are always drawn when I do this.

I feel like I have accomplished something huge. I’m responsible for my own bills, my own wellbeing, my own life. Granted, I will always have people to depend on should times get tough, but I’d like to depend as little on them as possible. After all, I’m a grown up now.

Getting my own apartment was an even bigger accomplishment than finding my job because now I have a place to call “home”. It’s MY home. I control who comes into my space. I control the energies that I allow to surround me. I decide when my windows get opened and what color of paint goes on my walls. I can now offer a place for my friends to crash if they’ve had a few too many to drive themselves home.

The neighborhood I live in is lovely too. Everything is close by. I can walk across the street to the bar or to my friend’s house. I can walk six blocks to Herbs & Arts, my favorite metaphysical store. There are independent record stores and coffee shops everywhere. If I really wanted to, I could walk to the clubs that I frequent on the weekends. I can also walk a few blocks to the local grocery store. My price of gas is going to decline substantially.

I feel amazing. I feel free. This is just one more confirmation that I am stronger than I ever thought I could be and that the decisions that led me here were the correct ones. This city and the people in it have helped me find my fire again… and now it’s time to set this city ablaze.

 

It’s Been Far Too Long… an Update

It has been far too long since I have updated this thing and for that I apologize. Technical difficulties (ie. my computer taking a crap on me) have prevented my being able to write as regularly as I used to.

Lots of things have been going on. My mental state has improved significantly due in part to my mom giving me a much needed verbal ass whoopin’, as well as my own decision to get out of the house and start making some friends. A few weeks ago, I decided to go exploring in Denver’s goth scene and I’m pretty sure I have found my home. The people I have met are amazing and in such a short time, I can already tell I have met some lifers… life-long friends that is. The club scene is an unlikely place to meet long term friends, but the people I have met have already showed me a plethora of different perspective on life, love and how to just let the music heal you. It’s working.

I’m apartment hunting in Capitol Hill. The neighborhood is amazing and close to all the places I want to be close to. I’m seeing a studio apartment this upcoming Saturday and I’m very excited. I’m also stoked because one of my California friends is in town and I get to see a familiar face.

I’m not dating anyone. Truthfully, I’m ok with making friends with people without looking at them as a potential boyfriend. Most of my friends, except for my friend Tina, are guys… but that’s normal. That’s how it has always been. In due time, I’m sure I’ll find someone I want to date and who wants to date me, but right now I’m good with friends. Love usually slaps me in the face when I’m least expecting it or wanting it anyway. Who’s to say that this time will be any different?

I’ve started researching a different spiritual path… I won’t get into details here, but it involves aspects of both Christianity and Paganism… and it feels perfect for me. So, I’ll continue learning and feeling and praying and loving and growing. I’m happy with this.

The most recent changing of events was that my mom and I lost a member of our family. Our Russian Blue, Mika, passed away this past Sunday. She was only three years old. She was a very special cat and her death pretty much devastated us both. Jack, my Marine, gave her to me before he left for his second tour in Iraq in 2007. He died a few months later. Mika’s death has been especially hard, but I know that her Daddy is taking care of her now.

For now, that’s all I feel like updating on. Of course, everything is far more detailed then I have let on, but there is a purpose to my elusiveness. You’ll see that purpose soon enough.

 

Love

A friend of mine was tagged in a picture that had this phrase in it… and I thought it was important enough to post as a blog. No original content, but perhaps an inkling of hope for me.

“To me, love is the sweetest thing in life. That’s why we’re all either in love or looking for love. Sometimes you have to work for it – especially if life gets in the way – but I believe true, deep love is always worth fighting for.”

I have to fight.